That is what i told my 6 yr old gal, Wawa.

Boy, was i wrong.

Eeyore and I played Wii a couple of days ago and we had so much fun. My right arm is still sore till today because of throwing punches in the air. Boxing, bowling, tennis… it was pure fun. I took it back home and both wawa and i had so much fun this morning. she love boxing and she perpire alot. I sat and from the angle i was looking at her, she look …. happy. All smiles. That look on her face….

Then i have to stop the fun and got to work. Ouch.

wouldn’t it be nice to spend time with your love ones? everyday? i am not giving up in my goals and dreams. 2011.

thank you sayang loaning the wii. you have make wawa happy, even for that short period.

I am not getting it from Eeyore lately. He praises online people on how great their cheek-bones are, what a beautiful name they have, how beautiful they are, how ambitious they are, … i can’t remember the last time he said that to me. Am I asking too much? I didn’t see him yesterday, a first for the past 7 months as he said if  i want someone who can talk to me and make me fly, I should find someone else and hung up the phone.  He is simply not trying I supposed. But after knowing he praises online women with the words that you yourself badly wanna hear, you think that you are simply not good enough for him.

I am not perfect, no one is. Being unfaithful is something i simply can’t tolerate. If Tiger Woods can cheat, that means other men can do it too.

Watched at our usual coffeeshop in Bedok.

Do you remember an occasion where someone you know knows your friend? …. or something like that. you get the jazz.

it is so wierd. I remembered dating Azmi, the guy who broke my heart. He left me high and dry, with no explanations whatsoever. I told close friends that I loved him so much that I was willing to take him in my life even after what he did. Well, that was even after 2 to 3 years he left me. He was a smart arse and the thing that attacted me to him was his interlectual.

Its been years since i last thought and spoke about him. i guess i have moved on with my life, completely long forgotten…. till last night when i was in Eeyore.

azmi_bar@hotmail.com

Eeyore showed me the above email address from Tagged. I then realized that Azmi and Eeyore are good buddies years back. OMG… OMG… OMG… During the time we were dating, they both are friends. Boo-hoo….

You don’t know the feeling I felt last night. Amzi and Eeyore are friends?? What a freaking small world.

Azmi is definately not invited to our wedding.

** I realized that i used past tense when i was commenting abt Azmi. Lol.. That says alot, aye.

Aww….. She was really awesome. So cute.

I was exhausted by the time the concert ended. Only bro and family and not to mentioned Eeyore turned up. The rest of my family members was not present and poor Sarah was looking for her grandparents.

My gal… all grown up. So fast!

Argh… I’m going to be a grandmother soon..???!!!!!

You know how we, as young children, looked up to adults? Our character and, may i safely say, our temper? Parents mould us because we live together and as children we tend to pick up their attitudes in life. I used to have resentments and a short temper outburst in life. I am better now as I realize, with the books that i have read and begin to undersatand what this can do to me. My child, Sarah will follow my bad traits and I don’t want that. Eeyore is one hell of a patience guy, because his mum taught him so. See? My mum is the total opposite. She talks rough, raise her voice for little things or questions you rudely and her love language is GIFTS. You give her gifts, especially money and she is an angel. If you don’t, then your life is completely transparent to her. I know because i have lived to see and feel the difference she make go through between me and my siblings.

She was mad at me last night. You know why? Because at 10.50pm, people are still at my house. Ok, her house. She didn’t bother to reply me when I was talking to her and when i politely ask her why, she said cruel remarks that me wonder – why is she full of bitterness? She complains to bro that I go out late and she don’t know what I am doing outside. I have been attending functions that led to us having supper outside. Whenever I have guests coming over for say, like last night, a smart money game, which by the way was about 8 people only, mum and dad will run to punggol. Always. Nver bother to find out what I’m doing.

Think – I go out and she wonder why. I show her what I am doing, she question me why.

I haven’t been on talking terms to parents for quite awhile now because I feel trapped with them. I can’t communicate with them at all.

How does one cope being bitter all the time? Is one’s life happy, living with such a heart?

Is running away, like I did 10 years ago, solve it? This time, its with Eeyore. Will it?

people are so shy to be associated with me.

am i that ugly.

am i that shameful to be known as someone’s girlfriend.

the feeling sucks.

i am trying so hard to become a person who easily forgive and forget.

hope this bloody, fucking book called “how to stop worrying and start living” work.

you can’t stop time. definately.

in this business, alot of people complain that they don’t have time.

but why are people late? seriously.

i am a punctual person. i plan my time and my day properly. well, unless something comes up, like a tummyache or something that needs wawa’s attention, then i will be late. other than that, i make sure i respect the time that was said or given. Why can’t people respect time? it pisses me off, really. While i am typing this, i am waiting for Luv. this am was a disastor to start off with. we are supposed to meet at 11.30am. i came down at 11.40am as wawa is having a tummyache. he needs to send his sister to pasir ris. then we drove off to janet’s place to collect the smart money game board that was already planned a week ahead that we are going to have this game today in the evening. then send wawa to bro’s house. We are supposed to meet Hyza at 12.30pm at her place in bedok to pick her up. Note : time is 12.15 and we are still at punggol. Then Shirley sms saying that we are supposed to bring our own artistry stuffs for the workshop. WTF. Last night don’t wanna say. Now, at the eleventh hour she ask us to bring. Then Luv decides to take the artistry stuff at janet’s place, then to his place to collect the board, then wait for his mum, then here, then there….

OMG. to begin with, i am tired, really fucking tired. I am unwell. I have tired. I am moody. I slept in the car as I am really tired. Luv and I have been arguing about time. What can i do about it? There is only 2 solutions to this.

Should i change my punctuality to suit him?

Should he try to be early?

I don’t know. i dont wanna change my punctuality habits. I was brought up to respect people’s time. I get all the jitters if i am late. I have the guilty look when i am late.

can we live together with this problem to begin with?

With the 2 days that i had with them,  i had a sore throat. A bad sore throat. I respect Luv alot being an educator as he mould the. No wonder he is often silent after work! His quota for the day exceeded while teching. Ahh… job hazards!

Then i realized that I have a 6 yr old daughter that eventually will grow up to a teenager in years to come. Now, that scares the hell out of me. Reason is i won’t have the time to attend to her. I will be busy trading my time for money that i won’t be able to trade my time for her. Ain’t that scary?

Amazing man. He brought me to tears in the beginning of his talk. He is so sincere. You can hear it in his voice. What a difference it made my life. My sunday was never been great! What is $25 compared to the inspiring and info you gathered listening to successful people like Ronnie. Some gave excuses like, I see how, I am busy, i am tired, ada open house, my cat sakit…. etc… hahha… humans are so wierd, aren’t they?

Today attended team meeting after being out of the system for awhile due to ramadan. Fyza and Lela came and it was refreshing to see other malays besides us.. LOL… and one quitter too. Hafid threw in the towel and called it a day.

QUIT???? huh… i am not surprised. Alot of crazy bums out there who are grinding their asses making the company they are working for rich but just quit grinding their asses to make THEMSELVES rich… again, humans are so wierd.

So if you are reading this and you are like Hafid who work hard for their bosses… don’t fret! I am here!!! If you are not afraid of hard work.. just for the next 5 years, then I’m the lady you should ask in generating passive income. Let’s get to the B quadrant, shall we?

lots of things happened. happy, sad…

August WLS
Finally decided to drive up. we met new friends by the way. Sid, Lela and Razali. Met them a week before the actual WLS and they were “dragged” by Eeyore and me to KL. Haha..! well, not really. They wanted to take a break. so we took Sid’s car to KL. He drove all the way up. As it was a manual car, i didn’t get to drive at all. Upset. Well, we reached there safely, didn’t we? 

New inspiration and new goals set during and after the refreshing WLS. All set and ready to go!

Teachers’ Day
Well, a day not meant for me but for darling Eeyore. Its his day but i managed to “tompang” in. We went for a full body massage and facial at Body Contours and jolly… it was a day worth not showing the plan! hahah… thanks sayang. It was a wonderful day well spend with you.

Oh well… lots of things happened that i cant really remembered. Hahah…. All I know we met new friends along the way. And my relationship with Eeyore is awesome and we love each other more each day.